comics are the best and worst things that ever happened to me
It is the start of the year 2000, and something is wrong.
Husbands and wives wake up next to each other, scared. They don’t know who the person in the bed with them is. Who is this person? Why are they in my house? Is this my house? Is this their house?
They go out to investigate. A five-year-old child uses a Windows 98 computer in the living room. The child turns around, and asks, “Is it time for me to go to school, mommy?”
The world is in panic. The President of the United States, who awoke in the Oval Office with no knowledge of being elected, calls for a large-scale investigation.
After weeks of asking adults and children alike what is going on, and looking at the various public records, they realize that the children are not confused at all. The adults can only remember what last happened in 1989. However, the children that can speak say that they were born anywhere from 1991 to 1996. Public officials can only draw one conclusion.
To every adult, the 1990s never happened. The children, however, cannot have come from nowhere.
It doesn’t take long after this conclusion for them to realize that only 90s kids remember the 90s.
A Milwaukee second-grader recently wrote to Joe Biden with an idea to limit gun violence. “Dear Vice President Biden, I have a great idea to help make our country safer, better and the best,” Myles, a student at Downtown Montessori Academy, proposed. “I think guns should shoot out chocolate bullets. Then no one will get killed and no one will be sad.”
Biden wrote back, endorsing the concept. “I really like your idea,” Biden’s note reads. ”If we had guns that shot chocolate, not only would our country be safer, it would be happier. People love chocolate. You are a good boy.”
